


A Thousand Years.

by Sayumi_Kioko



Series: ColdFlash Week 2019 (April) [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Character Death Fix, ColdFlash Week 2019, Hero Leonard Snart, Leonard Snart Lives, M/M, Suicidal Ideation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-23 11:25:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18548803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sayumi_Kioko/pseuds/Sayumi_Kioko
Summary: ColdFlash Week 2019 - Day 1: Fix-it.Leonard Snart blows up the Oculus, but something happens.





	A Thousand Years.

**Author's Note:**

> Hellooo! I know I've been missing, and this event has all the fault! I've been focused on writing the fics for this week, and I hope you enjoy all of them! :)
> 
> This work has been inspired by 'A thousand years by Christina Perri'. If you have time, listen to this song because is beautiful <3
> 
> As always, thanks to [SheWhoWalksUnseen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheWhoWalksUnseen/profile) for beta-ing this work ^w^
> 
> Get ready for the angst! ;)

Leonard Snart knew he was going to die. He was going to blow up the Oculus, there was no way he was going to survive that. That's why he took Mick's place, because he didn't want his partner to sacrifice himself for people that didn't value him.

Leonard also felt like he owed one to his friend. He couldn't kill Mick when he betrayed them and Snart couldn't let him die now. But he had abandoned him when the arsonist was in a bad place.

Leonard should have taken the jump ship to go back to their year. He didn't owe those white hats anything. It would have been easier to drop everything there and and go back to their criminal ways. Maybe help Barry if he needed it.

Now he was in a big mess and there was no way on going out of there alive. At least he would die a hero, even though it was useless, he had helped a lot of people. His sister and Barry... They were free.

As he stood there, waiting for the Oculus to explode, he thought about everything he regretted. It wasn't a long list, but there were some things in it.

Killing his father, for example, wasn't something he was proud of. He had to do it, of course, because if he didn't Lisa would always be in danger, but he wished it was someone else the one who did it.

Another thing he regretted, besides of not going home earlier with Mich, was not telling Barry he loved him. They had been in a relationship for more than half a year and only a few people knew about them. He wished he had let everybody know because that way Barry would be able to cry in front of his friends and family with a reason. Now he would have to hide and it was fully Leonard's fault.

He was okay with the rest of his choices. Now Snart was looking Death straight to her eyes. The brightness was overwhelming him and he knew what was coming next when he felt his hand warming too much.

"No strings on me."

They were meant to be Leonard's last words. However, Snart woke up on his bed like nothing happened. It was weird, because he should be in the med bay, but he wasn't going to complain. He was alive.

He sat up carefully and patted his body slowly, looking for any injury, but found none. Maybe he had been in coma, but then again it was weird because he wasn't in the med bay. Why the Hell wasn't he in the med bay?

He stood up after he was sure he wasn't going to open a wound or pass out and walked out of his room. Leonard wasn't stupid, don't he second he saw a very familiar incident in front of him, he knew something was wrong.

"Finally!" Rip exclaimed. "This is important, Mr. Snart, where have you been?"

"Around."

The thief knew that he had to tell them everything, explain the others that something was happening, but he didn't. He wasn't used to having a team to rely on. They would be a burden and he needed to understand what was happening as soon as possible because he had less than a day to do it.

In less than twenty-four hours he would die again the Oculus. Or maybe he wouldn't. Maybe this was his second chance to change his future.

Leonard could take Mick and go home. Go back with Barry and tell him how much he loved him. Ray would die like the hero he wanted so much to be.

He was so sure about it that he got everything ready to go back to Central with the arsonist, but when they had the chance Leonard just couldn't. He sighed and sent Mick home, unconscious and alone. At least this way he wouldn't feel guilty about his death.

The thief preferred Mick hating him for knocking him out again instead of sad and drunk. That man didn't know how to deal with guilt and he wouldn't care about anything.

That's how he decided to die hero again. He wasn't proud of it, but at least this time Leonard could send his friend home. If he wanted to join the Legends again it would be because Mick wanted and not because Leonard tricked him again.

Captain Cold faced the Oculus for the second time and waited for his death. The brightness and the warm feeling overwhelming him in a familiar way, and the words slipping out of his mouth. However, he still thought how much he loved his boyfriend.

“No strings on me.”

Leonard felt disoriented when he woke up again on his bed. He didn't know what the Hell was happening but he was alive and, apparently, living the same day one more time.

"Finally!" Rip exclaimed. "This is important, Mr. Snart, where have you been?"

The thief almost hesitated but he drawled the very same word he said the last time. “Around.”

Leonard observed everything with sharp eyes, trying to memorize everything. If he was going to live the same day over and over he needed to know if something was different. Even the smaller detail could be important.

The idea of going back to Central with Mick rounded his head, but he shrugged it off this time because he already knew what would happen. Besides, what if he decided to let Raymond die and he didn't get more chances? The boy's death would be on him and he wasn't interested. Also, Barry probably would be very upset with him if he ever found out what happened.

Leonard thought about his options and smirked. The only thing he needed to do was to get Rip to take Ray's place in the Oculus. The thief didn't hated the man, but unlike the rest of the team, Rip hadn't earned his respect yet. Besides, this was mostly his fight and if someone had to die, why not the man that had started all that mess in the first place?

The only issue was that he couldn't get the captain of the Waverider to sacrifice himself. That moron almost got Ray killed three times and Mick other five times until Leonard gave up. It didn't matter how many things on the plan he changed, it still ended up on his death.

The thief tried several times just using duct tape, but he had to ran back to the Oculus because the Times Masters almost stopped it from exploding. Leonard thought that it wasn't fair for him to die so many times.

Eventually, he told Mick. It was hard and their conversation was tense because they were still on a weird place regarding their relationship, but even like that, the arsonist was the person he trusted the most in that ship.

“So you're living your own Groundhog Day.” Mick commented, laying on his bed. “And you can't break the cycle.”

“Exactly. One of the times we defeated the Time Master without fighting even and the fucking Oculus still blew up when I was passing near.” Leonard scowled. He didn't know what to do anymore. “I can beat those bastards alone by now, damn it!”

“Have you tried running away?” Mick asked with obvious boredom in his voice. “Going home and forgetting about all this shit.”

“I can't do that!” Snart exclaimed with frustration. “Raymond would die and Barry would be very upset with me!”

“Barry?”

“I…” He sighed. “I've been dating The Flash for more than half a year, but we've kept it in secret and now I'm dying over and over and I can't even tell him how much I love him.” It wasn't habitual for Leonard to break down, but it sometimes happened and he couldn't do anything about it. “If I go to talk to him I won't be back on time to save that idiot. As annoying as he is, he doesn't deserve to die like this, but you know it already or you wouldn't take his place every fucking time I don't send you home in the jump ship.”

The arsonist glared at him in silence for some seconds and finally grunted something like 'stupid idiot of a partner’.

“Gideon, get in touch with your STAR Labs. self in phone call mode.” Mick ordered, ignoring the confused look on his friend's face. “Our present time, of course, and tell Barry's friends that it's a private call for The Flash.” The man woke up and walked to the door. “You're welcome.”

The arsonist walked away without looking back and left the other man alone. Leonard didn't know what to do until he heard, for the first time in a too many many months, the voice of his boyfriend. Counting all the times he had repeated the Oculus’ loop, it had been almost a year.

“Leonard?” The hero seemed both exhausted and excited. “I didn't know you have a Gideon in your ship! I'm glad she's helping you and from now on we will be able to talk more, I missed you so much-”

“I love you.”

“What?” Barry shut up, perplexed. He always thought he would be the one to say those words first. “Is… Is something wrong?”

“No, Scarlet, everything is fine, I promise.” He lied smoothly. It was his job, after all. “I just missed you a lot too, and I realize that it's because I love you and I want everyone to know that we are together. I don't want to risk some poor idiot trying to flirt with you.”

“Oh, well, I love you too.” Leonard could feel the soft smile in his voice. “Sorry if I sound off, I'm just having some problems dealing with Zoom and I'm a bit tired.”

“It's okay, but you'll have to tell me all about that other Earth and Zoom later.” He teased playfully, pretending that he didn't know he was going to die that same day. “I wasn't aware that we knew that the theory of the multiverse was real.”

“Yeah, I didn’t told you when you were still here.”

Barry ended up explaining a lot of things to Leonard and told a large part of what happened with Zoom. When the moment of finishing the call arrived, the thief reminded the hero that he loved him and went away.

After that, his routine was always the same. When he woke up he would go to tell Mick everything and then he would spend the rest of the morning talking with Barry. It was useless trying to change their plan of attack because he would end up in the Oculus again.

The speedster was the only thing that cheered Leonard up after more than five thousand of deaths.

By the time he had died over ten thousand times, he was going crazy, but he was still very sure of not letting other person take his place in the Oculus. He didn’t want to disappoint Barry. Even if his fate was to die over and over in there forever, he would take it. He was able to talk with his boyfriend and spend his last hours with his best friend, he couldn’t ask for anything else.

“If I knew someone was going to die but didn’t do anything to prevent it, would you be mad at me?” Leonard asked the speedster one day, when he was feeling specially defeated and weak after dying more than fifteen thousand times. “If I knew that someone could survive if I took his place but I didn’t do it, would you still love me?”

“Len, are you sure you’re okay?” Barry looked concerned. “You seem pretty tired, and I don’t know what’s happening there, but if you need help you know you can ask for me to go there, right?”

“Yes, I know, don’t worry.” Leonard tried to sound convincing. “I was just wondering how much you want me to be a hero, you don’t have to come here. We can handle Savage.”

Of course, the thief didn’t want his boyfriend to go to the ship. He was sure that Barry would be the hero with a heart of gold and would take his place, and Leonard couldn’t handle that. He preferred having to live this way forever and try to look for a solution slowly.

He was sure that one day he would be able to break the loop and be free. Leonard would be able to go back home with his boyfriend and kiss him with his family and friends looking at him. He wouldn’t hide their relationship anymore.

“If you’re sure…” Barry mumbled, unsure. “But I would love you anyways, Len.” The brunette didn’t have any doubt of that. “I rather have you alive than dying a hero.”

Leonard smiled softy, he believed it, but for some reason, even with the speedster giving him permission to let Ray die, he just couldn’t. Maybe it was because he had been saving his stupid ass for more than forty years now.

Being in that ship for that long had made him soft for all those moron heroes. Even he would save Rip if he was in danger. Leonard considered them his family, and he knew them better than they would ever suspect.

Whenever he had a breakdown, though, he spent the day on his room. He didn’t talk with Mick, Barry or anybody. He just waited the moment to hide, and then went to the Oculus to blew it up.

It felt weird to cry again after so many years, but he just couldn’t help it. He just curled up on his bed, thinking about how damaged he was and waited. After eighty years dying every day, he knew that he was really dead. He was on Hell for sure, and this was his torture.

Talking with his best friend, who at the moment hated Leonard. Talking with Barry and not being able to see or touch him.  Doing everything he could to save his family and knowing that it would be useless because he would have to do it again the next day.

More than once the thief thought about killing himself before the Oculus blew up, on his room, to finish that damned loop, but he never did it. He knew it would be useless and that someone would have to take his place in the Oculus.

If he had to let someone of his family die, at least Leonard would make sure to leave alive himself. Committing suicide would be useless, even as tempting as it was some days. It would only hurt his friends, his family, and Barry when someone told him what happened.

Other that those days he couldn’t stand up, he told his boyfriend and Mick how much he loved them. At some point Leonard started telling the rest of the Legends how important they were for him, and even if they looked at him like he was crazy, he knew that deep down they felt the same.

One day, though, having lived more than fifty thousand deaths in the Oculus, he called Barry in a breakdown. He didn’t do that before because he knew he only would worry the hero, but in that moment he just needed to talk with him.

“I’m sorry, Barry.” Leonard said with a soft sob. “I don’t know how much I will be able to stand this. I don’t want to let them die, but I’m going crazy.”

“Len, what are you talking about?” The speedster asked, his voice full of concern. “Why would you let them die? Is something wrong? Do you need help?”

“I just miss you so much.” He went on, as if Barry hadn’t talked. “I would give anything for you to be here for only a few minutes, but I can’t ask you to do that, I know you’re very busy dealing with Zoom right now.”

“How do you know about Zoom?” The brunette frowned. “I mean, you’ve been gone for some time, I could have defeated him.”

“A time travel thing.” The thief dismissed tiredly with a lie. “I can’t tell you anything about your future and I have to go, I shouldn’t have called you like this.”

“Wait, Len-“

“I have to go, Barry, my team needs me on the bridge.” Leonard closed his eyes, laying on his bed and trying not to cry. “I’ll call you tomorrow, I promise. I love you.”

Before the speedster could say something else or complain, the criminal made Gideon finish the call and burst into tears. He had to be strong, he needed to be there for his friends, so he cried until he fell asleep.

The alarm woke him up, as always happened when he was sleeping at that hour, and he hid to the same place he always did. He brought Sara with him, like he did every time, and when they were safe they went out.

They saved his friends and Leonard followed Ray and Mick to the Oculus. Nothing changed, he was living again that day like the original one. Or well, almost. Since he discovered he could talk with Barry he called him instead of chatting with Sara.

When the thief felt like everything was useless, he just let things happen like they originally did. That way at least could be sure that he would die in the Oculus. He didn’t need to focus in anything else, so when Mick took Ray’s place in that monster, Len walked to his side.

He felt numb when he hit his friend with his Cold Gun so he could be the one dying. Or not dying, it didn’t matter. He took a deep breath, tears running down his cheeks and said shakily the same words he always said.

“No strings on me.”

He felt the warmth of the Oculus overheating, the brightness and the soft arms around his body. Leonard opened his eyes wide, ready to fight whoever was trying to avoid the explosion, but suddenly he wasn’t there anymore.

“Oh, my Gosh, Len, are you okay?” Barry asked touching him everywhere to make sure that the thief wasn’t hurt. “For a second I thought I wasn’t going to get to you on time, I was so worried and scared!”

“The Oculus!” Leonard exclaimed, defeated. “What happened with the Oculus?”

“It’s gone, Len, you’ve done it.” The hero assured kindly.  “There’s no Oculus anymore. It’s over.”

“It’s over.” He repeated sobbing. “It’s over.”

Leonard cried again, even after being all day crying, he couldn’t stop himself. Now, though, his tears were relieved ones. He wasn’t repeating that awful day, the Oculus was gone and Barry was with him. He passed out again because he was too tired and his body told him that he needed some rest.

When the thief woke up on his bed the next day, he almost yelled, furious, resigned and hollow. However, all those feelings disappeared the second he realized he wasn’t alone on his bed.

“Barry.” He swallowed hard and reached the speedster’s body with his hand, terrified that it was just the product of his imagination. “Fuck, you’re really here.”

“Len?” The hero mumbled sleepily, but he woke up suddenly when he saw that his boyfriend was awake. “Len, I’m so sorry!”

“What are you talking about?” He asked with a frown. Did everybody remember everything that happened during the loop? He hoped they didn’t because otherwise it would be very embarrassing. “You saved my life, Scarlet, there’s nothing you should be sorry about.”

“I should have realized earlier that there was something wrong with you.” Leonard tensed. It would be just his luck that everyone knew he had saved them so many times. “After you finished the call I went home to get the parka you left there and made Cisco vibe you because you were off… What we saw… all those conversations, you dying in the Oculus… I came here the second I knew what was happening.” Barry bit his bottom lip. “I should have known. I don’t know if I saw all of our conversations, but in some of them you were acting weird too, and I should have done something then.”

“I didn’t want you to know, Barry, and you know I’m very good at hiding things.” Leonard soothed him. “I was afraid that you would come here to take my place or something crazy like that.”

“I know, but- I’m still so sorry I haven’t done anything, Len.” The thief saw his boyfriend’s eyes getting wet. “And I know you’ve told me every time that you love me, but please, don’t leave me now that you can go on with your life, because I love you too so, so much.”

“Barry, I’ve loved you for, literally, a thousand years.” Leonard told the other placing his hand on his cheek and stroking it softly. “There’s no force on this Earth or any other of the multiverse that will stop me for loving you for a thousand more.” The thief smiled and kissed the speedster slowly, enjoying of the feeling after so many, many years. “Now let’s go. We have to tell everybody that I’m leaving this fucking ship because I have to go back home with my lovely boyfriend.”

Barry’s smile after that statement was almost worth all that time he had spent in the loop and that’s why he knew he was right. He loved that man so much that he would spend another thousand years just to make him happy. Luckily, though, he wasn’t going to do that because it wasn’t necessary and because he was sure the hero would be happier with him by his side.

**Author's Note:**

> So that happened! xD I hope you guys enjoyed it :)
> 
> Anything you want to say, go ahead and leave a comment, don't be shy! ;) And you can also leave a kudo if you want me to feel loved~ <3
> 
> Thanks for reading and see you tomorrow! :3


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